Arts New Jokes from New York City
posted by on October 5 at 14:20 PM
The new John Cameron Mitchell movie Shortbus — which opens the 2006 Seattle Lesbian & Gay Film Festival (Oct 13-22) — had a screening last night in New York City, and afterward there was a party for the cast and crew at the Cock. The Cock is a bar for gaysexuals. Its previous incarnation, on Avenue A, was storied, and the new location is pretty damn sleazy too. Its basement room is not unlike something you’d see in Shortbus, minus women. People having sex. A DJ in the corner.
John Cameron Mitchell got up and said he’d just been touring the country to promote the movie. “I just got back from D.C.,” he said. “Had drinks with Mark Foley.” Then, as the laughter died down: “Fuck him.” (Everyone in D.C. kept asking Mitchell about Foley — “as if he has anything to do with the movie or any of us.”)
Some of the actors in the movie performed songs and others got up and told jokes. In the very, very crowded bar, while holding a drink, I managed to jot down three. The rest are lost to time.
Why don’t congressmen use bookmarks?
Because they like to bend over their pages.
Why are Jewish men circumsized?
Because Jewish women won’t touch anything unless it’s 20% off.
Why did Jesus die on the cross?
Because he forgot his safe word.
The first joke I'd replace bookmarks with podiums, but they're all funny. Can't wait until Shortbus comes to Seattle.
The first joke I'd replace bookmarks with podiums, but they're all funny. Can't wait until Shortbus comes to Seattle.
sorry for the double click post, and I just got what he meant by "bend over" - ie, fold the corner. I was picturing Foley stooped over a book. blah blah blah me tired time for drinky.
The page joke isn't exactly new—and neither is the 20% off joke...
If I hear the bookmark joke again, I'm going to essplode. Wonkette, Michael Musto, and now you, in 24 hours, it's too much.
fnarf, you're lucky you haven't ran into me this week, i think i've told that bookmark joke approximately 5000 times.
LET THE PROBE BEGIN!
I remember the "bend over a page" joke from the first congressional page scandal 20-some years ago. That scandal is being mentioned a bit right now, because apparently it involved a democrat who didn't resign. I don't remember any details from the incident, I just remember the joke.
The page joke is MUCH older than twenty years. The oldest use of it I know was by Oscar Wilde in the late 1800's and I think it was old then.
I've not heard, (or told) the page joke in 20 years, at least. It may even pre-date Gerry Studds' imbroglio, but not sure who it would have applied to before that.
I first heard the page joke when I was redecorating Windsor castle for King Henry the VIII.
I was young.
Frizelle is The Stranger's official behind the curve guy.
Next week he's going to stop the presses about that new OK Go video.
Geez. Tough crowd.
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