IS NOTHING FREAKING SACRED? Not only did poor Lindsay Lohan have shots of her VJ flashed all over the internet this week (don’t look, it’s beneath you), it was also reported that beau Harry Morton DIDN’T propose to her after all, and now? According to TMZ.com, her hotshit Hermès Birkin bag with a MILLION DOLLARS WORTH OF JEWELRY inside was stolen from Heathrow airport!
(In case you didn’t know, not even God herself can get a Hermès Birkin bag without knowing the right people—which she doesn’t. So screw the jewelry—JUST RETURN THE BAG!!)

“It is alleged that as [Lindsay] exited the Terminal One building, she noticed that an orange Hermès handbag was missing from her suitcase trolley.” The bag, according to police, contained “a quantity of jewelry.”

Lindsay’s rep, Leslie Sloane, confirms to TMZ the theft occurred and that Lindsay is extremely upset about the loss of personal belongings. “She is begging for the return of the items,” Sloane says. “She doesn’t care how she gets them back, she just wants her stuff back.”

The Hermès Birkin bag that was stolen also contained Lindsay’s much needed asthma medication.

Yeah! How is she supposed to screw everything in Hollywood while wheezing like a chicken with a perforated lung? GIVE IT BACK, YA CREEP!