HUMP HUMP: The Great and the Gross
—Attack of the Ninja Fluffers! made me want to take a vow of celibacy.
—As David Schmader notes in his Slog post (“Peeking between my fingers at a screenful of something—male ejaculate? female ejaculate? rubber cement?—dripping out of a Pirate Damsel’s vagina. [There’s nothing more to say.”]), I think I can add one more germane comment: “EEEEWWW!” That way leads not to wood.
—To the actors in Fucking Seattle: that took massive balls and ovaries. For the sequel, shall we see your antics in the Space Needle?
—Ignis Faatus reaffirmed my belief that anything filmed in slow-motion is sexier, especially an ass slap. If I had gone with my usual contrarian instincts, I would’ve voted for this arty flick.
—By contrast, The Booker Hoss Show, with its sped-up, quick-cut, gang-bang sequence, proved to be exactly the opposite: extremely unerotic. However, bonus points for using unexpectedly poignant John Lennon songs on the soundtrack.
—I caved in to consensus opinion and chose as my favorite Cum on Love!!! Bo Logan Is Waiting. The woman was exceptionally hot, the premise was cleverer than that of most porn, and the climactic sequence reminded me of the sex scene in A Clockwork Orange. I love humor and I like porn, but usually not together. However, Bo Logan has a keen talent for, uh, conjugating the two. I hope he and his partner have a blast in Las Vegas.
Re: Fucking Seattle. The film was fascinating for its mise en scene and hot for the stars' enthusiasm. The thing that threw me was that the man kept referring to the woman as his sister in the most unbelievably creepy way ever. Am I the only one who caught that?