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Friday, August 18, 2006

The Morning News

Posted by on August 18 at 7:30 AM

Due to my well-documented extraordinarily crappy job on yesterday’s Morning News, today’s post was compiled with intense, time-consuming care. Feel free to file extensive, snarky complaints in the comments section below.

A military report completed a month ago but released today suggests that Marines destroyed evidence and misled investigators about the killings of Iraqi “insurgents” in Haditha. The 24 Iraqis killed there included 10 women and children and an elderly man in wheelchair. The page in the official military logbook for that day is missing.

A judge rules that Bush’s wiretapping is unconstitutional and it’s gotta stop. Don’t start saying “bomb” on the phone yet, though — as the gov’t appeals, it can continue the taps.

Who’s ripping off communities? “First it was the Jews, then it was the Koreans and now it’s Arabs.” Wal-Mart’s image consultant resigns after taking that short, quotable route to offending the most people possible. A fitting end to arguably the worst week in Wal-Mart history.

Despite allegations made in an English newspaper a few months ago, an investigation found that iPod factories aren’t sweatshops! They did turn up a couple violations at Apple’s factories in China though — workers work more than six consecutive days 25% of the time. Apple’s official report is kinda dry, but maybe some of you tech nerds will want to read it.

Israel raises alarm at allowing into Lebanon UN peacekeepers from countries that don’t recognize Israel.

Ft. Lewis soldier Lt. Ehren Watada famously refused to serve in Iraq. His pre court-martial hearings (packed with anti-Bush testimony) began yesterday.

School fundraising initiatives I-87 and I-88, slated for the fall elections, may violate a statute of Washington tax law.

Old news:
August 18th, 1227 - Genghis Khan’t live forever. We now mark the anniversary of his passing with the release of Snakes on a Plane.


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Timely posting! Especially impressive on a Friday.

If you are 19 you are most certainly the only 19 year old up and at work at 730 am. I'd demand a nice tidy raise from Savage on that basis alone.

"a statute of Washington tax law" is redundant. It's like saying "a law of Washington tax law."

A for effort, though.

You forgot to mention that the first Bigfoot Field Researchers Organization's Washington Cascades Expedition has started and will result with the capture of Bigfoot on Sunday.


http://www.bfro.net/news/roundup/washington.asp

You totally had me until "Khan't". You're dead to me now.

You misspelled "misled" in the first news item. But it was still strangely accurate, because Marines almost certainly mislead investigators to this very day. On the whole, you did a wonderful job.

Sarah, I hope your email is smirk@.

You didn't just quit, did you?

Thanks, Andrew, I'll fix it. Maybe? You make a good point and I kind of like how it reads in the present... I'll weigh that against the death threats from the copy dept. and decide what to do.

Dudes, don't get hypercritical. Law can be a mass noun meaning the collection of all laws, or statutes. I'm not certain if "of" is the correct preposition there, but it makes enough sense for a blog.

Yeah, but Khan't?

Questionable grammar is fogivable.

Khan't made me wince.

Don't listen to the naysayers.

"Genghis Khan’t live forever" is freaking hillarious!!!!

Dude, she's 19. Quit tryin' to score.

street legal? 19's ok.

the only thing is, older women at least know what they want and will tell you when you're not doing it. far less mind games and sulks, IMHO.

plus, the sex is better.

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