Slog - The Stranger's Blog

Line Out

The Music Blog

« Why Are All Those Thin and Pre... | Pot Cookie, Mr. Mayor? »

Wednesday, August 30, 2006

I Thought Every Woman Knew This Stuff

Posted by on August 30 at 11:25 AM

But just in case you were out sick from school that day: A Guide to Laying Down the Hardline in the Bedroom, by a feminist stripper. “If a woman does not want to have sex, or is uncomfortable doing a sexual act, or doing a sexual act a certain way, or simply not in the mood, the word No should be enough. End of story. If a male continues on with the pressure or merely takes what he wants, those things are coercion and rape, and are punishable by law. But if you find No gets boring or old, or if it is not so much a matter of coercion and rape, well, I suggest the following tactics for dealing with the penis-bearing oppressors when they get out of hand…
Penis-bearing overlord: “I wish you had bigger tits.”
Upstart Female: “Well, I wish you had smaller tits and a bigger cock, but I don’t make a big deal about it now, do I?”
Hilarious.


CommentsRSS icon

Love this! Wish I had this guide handy when I was with my ex. Sad for him is that he would have had had more dom action had he not been such an asshole, and actually worked on how to be a proper dom...
Lucky for me I now am with someone who does me right... a true gent.

Pardon the grammar gaffes.

Umm, this article seems to shoot down any discussion of sexual fulfillment between men and women. Certainly, guys who don't ask first have stepped over the line, and perhaps "no" should be enough for a casual fling.

But what if a man has some vanilla fantasy he wants to play out with his repressed wife of 10 years. Or what if the wife wants her squeamish husband to lick her clit every once in a while? Are you saying that "No!" should be the end of the discussion? Sounds like a recipe for infidelity and/or divource to me.

Penis Bearing Husband: This is someone using humor to make a point. Ask your wife to explain it to you.

Penis Bearing Husband: "Honey, I don't get the point of this blog post. Will you explain it to me?"

Upstart Female: "How about instead I hack off your penis with a dull rusty knife, feed it to you for dinner, and then invite all my girlfriends over to point and laugh at your bloody, penis-free groin?"

Funny, someone asked me to do that just the other day.

Castration accounts for about half of my business these days. Not many return customers though.

Well, hell, if you just cut it halfway off, then there's some left for next time.

Asymptotic castration, anyone?

Yeah, I get that it's humor but... If I had ONE such nastyass exchange with a lover, it'd be the last. I don't really think "go fuck yourself" is a great response to "hey, I'd like to try this sexual thing."

Comments Closed

In order to combat spam, we are no longer accepting comments on this post (or any post more than 45 days old).