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Tuesday, August 29, 2006

I Am Not A Crook

Posted by on August 29 at 10:46 AM

The FBI is investigating Thomas Kinkade, Painter of Light.

On the always great Edward Winkleman today: inventing a new art movement. I’d say we’re in late-ThatsallIgotism, mid-Sizzlemyshizelism, and early-Geewilikerism. Whatcha think?


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Thomas Kinkade once got drunk and urinated on Pooh. I don't mean he pissed on shit, I mean he was at Disneyland and urinated on the poor college intern in a Winnie the Pooh costume.

Thomas Kinkade, Painter of Crap. Art Karma bites him on the ass at last.

I'm pretty sure I saw a Law and Order about Kinkade a year or so ago. I guess the headlines decided to rip back.

his crappy paintings should be grounds for arrest!

Thomas Kinkade, painter of old lady's bathroom hangings.

Let's not start hating old ladies, now, OK?

Kinkaid's freakish paintings serve a cultural purpose. It's not the purpose that you think you learned in Art 101, but it's there. It makes people happy.

And, if he turns out to be a crook, then he's a better artist than anyone thought. Financial and creative scamming is what art is all about in 21st century, isn't it? How is Kincaid different from Chihuly or Julian Schnabel?

Anyone who invests in a company, because the owner claims to be Christian, is a fucking moron. If the owner was trustworthy, he wouldn't have to make such a big deal out of his religion, would he?

Which is why I only hire companies who put jesus fish in their logos, yellow pages ads, and on their vans. Otherwise the person you're dealing with could be a non-believing sinner!

I don't care, I am still down with his candles, they are so lively and spirited, I mean...wait a minute, dude! Say it's not so, The Thomas Kinkade candles have been removed from the Glade site !?? I smell something amiss here. I suppose you are going to cop seasonal offerings or something. I don't buy it-- the world is screwed.

I saw some LOVERLY TK Christmas ornaments in the most recent Ladies Home Journal. Right next to the freakish baby doll "you can feel breathe".

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