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Thursday, August 3, 2006

Calling All Hookers!

Posted by on August 3 at 9:44 AM

The CW network (that’s the name of the new combined WB and UPN net) just announced their newest reality show, “The Search for the Next Pussycat Doll”—a contest based on the most egregiously awful girl group ever! (For those under a rock, the Pussycat Dolls are a group of glorified strippers who parlayed the one-hit wonder “Don’t Cha” into an overextended 15 minutes of fame.) The group already has six members (five of whom do absolutely NOTHING except shake their tits) and are now, for reasons only known to commerce, looking for a SEVENTH member. And dig this quote!

“At its core, this show goes beyond just finding a new Pussycat Doll; it’s about female empowerment, self-discovery and personal transformation,” said Dawn Ostroff, CW’s president of entertainment.

To this I declare, “IS THERE NO GOD??” Now, I love a good, bootylicious stripper as much as the next red-blooded American. And I absolutely ADORED the Spice Girls! But for some reason I wish all six of these gals (and the as-yet unrealized seventh) would get run over by a truck!
Care to psychoanalyze me?

pussycat_dolls_1.jpg


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Really, what's the point? None of these people are stars. Their contract specifies that they're salaried employees, allowing them to be completely and totally interchangeable. The lead singer's voice is so generic that anyone can replace her with just a bit of studio magic.

Y'know, they'd be sexy if they ate a sandwich or something.

Or, I suppose, if they just ate on a regular basis.

Call central casting and get us a multi-cultural, girl empowerment band, STAT!

Didn't the Pussycat Dolls start as a pseudo-burlesque gig for some of LA's B-list celebrity whores?

Pussycat Dolls? Those trannies are proof that 30 is the new 20.

Exactly. Hott? Nott. They look kind of greasy to me.

comment # 4 FTW !!

on a side note, they performed on so you think you can dance and were one of the few pop performers whoring themselves who acually sang instead of lipsinging and danced.

Not any different than all those boy bands that cropped up in recent years. It's all marketing.

Aw c'mon. I bet you're all about how fake the Monkees are, too. I'm an English teacher, and even I think you sound pedantic, Wm Stephen. Relax and let the popular culture wash over you.

They remind me of the women in the Fanta commercials.

Exactly: hot like them.

http://www.fanta.com/index.jsp

Now you've crossed the fucking line! Those Fanta Girls are talented and beautful (I like the purple one)! They are the patron saints of corporate whoredom (this year).

The Pussycat Dolls are what happens when you allow a boot-leg Lou Pearlman to make a public spectacle of molesting his own inner child.

On a side note: I keep expecting Scooby Doo to peel off one of their faces to reveal Tommy Lee or Dave Navarro.

The Monkees were great. The Monkees had fantastic songs and great playing by the best musicians of the time -- the same guys who played on all those records by the Beach Boys, Sonny & Cher, The Byrds, and so on. The Monkees kicked ass.

These creatures have none of that. They have tits and asses.

Oh please. They're icky. They're made to look even more icky. If icky were a noun, they'd show this picture in the dictionary. And the CW network viewers, well... we do like our icky...

This is America... Where we can't get enough of anorexic skanks. _Especially_ the anorexic skanks with boob jobs! Yeah! Bring 'em ON!!!

Tennis stars photos here: <a href=http://tennisstars.info>Tennis Stars</a>

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