"Satan delayed my flight?"

Damn that Satan!

Keep your prayers coming, little ones.

My prayer was answered, you kept him away from here!!!

It's time for the pastor to organize a national boycott of the airline that tried to stop his message.

I thought Satan ruled under the earth, and Jesus lived in Heaven and ruled the skies? (with humans being trapped in the middle). And that only after the puritians had their rapture would satan rule the earth and air (but not heaven, cuz its God's forever and ever)?

Was there somesort of biblical paradigm shift that I missed? I'm sure even the "Liberal/Jew" media would have given the rapture "a wink and a nod" (a least on TV, if not for the sake of visuals).

Or is THE REV speaking in some sort of "right-wing christian" code where the opposite of what he says is the true meaning?

Oh, don't get them started. There are tons of confusing and contradictory names for Belial, the Dragon, the God of this World, the King of Tyrus, Apollyon, Abaddon, the Prince of the Power of the Air, the Prince that shall Come, and (my fave) Little Horn. Check 'em out:

http://www.biblestudygames.com/biblestudies/satannames.htm

It's enough to keep us stocked with metal bands for the next 1000 years.

June 27, 2006
Dear Prayer Warrior,

Talk about spiritual warfare, I arrived at the airport EARLY this morning only to be told the flight was canceled. After some time spent in the men's room at Sea-Tac (where I was able to "council" some poor misguided homosexuals with My Mighty Shaft, I caught a later flight.

I had a wonderful flight to Denver (The Lord told me that the church should send me First Class), and caught my flight to Indianapolis only to be brought back due to mechanical difficulties, just as I was on my third G&T, and about to enter the "Mile High Club". Do you think the enemy (the prince and power of the air) wants me to speak? Or was it just that one of those bitchy male "Stewardesses" faked the whole thing because I wouldn't give him a second glance.

Anywhoozle, Please pray for this important event, that God’s message would be broadcast with or without my arrival, and that there are similar misguided homosexuals in the bathrooms here at Denver International.

Still hoping to make it to Indianapolis, so that I can get a hooker who will take a dump on my chest, and spread this important message, etc, etc, etc, I remain...

Your Pastor,
Hutch

"the prince and power of the air"? Could he BE any more pagan? Been doing a bit too much standing athwart Magog, there, Kenny-boy. You're supposed to break the tablets in half.

The man needs to be committed. Seriously, if any person were that deranged about anything not related to an "accepted" religion we'd all instantly see it for what it is -- a serious, crippling delusion.

Of course if everything had gone a-ok he would have praised God and claimed it as a sign he is doing God's work. Surely God had a guiding hand in his successful trip! But since things didn't go as planned it's Satan's fault. Funny how that works. I guess he didn't pray hard enough?

How arrogant to assume that Satan actually gives a shit about his stupid little trip. And what's with "the enemy"? Sounds like the in-flight movie was LOTR.

Someone must have said a Monty Pythonesque prayer: O god, maketh unto them their aluminium parts to cleave, but in small ways, o lord that knoweth the ways of aluminium, yay unto the utmost quark, that it be an annoyance unto them and delayeth their passage over thine earth. Let their delay not be too short. Yay, let them miss their appointed times. But let not their delay be too long, that of the fruit of refunded fees they shall not taste.

I love the Prayer Warrior posts. Keep 'em rolling. It's like Rev Hutch is on team Slog.

My prayer was not answered, as the mechanical difficulties were discovered in time.

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