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Tuesday, March 7, 2006

All Hail Katharine DeBrecht!

Posted by on March 7 at 10:47 AM

In yesterday’s Oscar post, I excerpted a bit of an amazing press release I received concerning one Katharine DeBrecht, “an author of conservative children’s books and mother of three” who’s taken detailed objection to the parade of evil that passed for this year’s Oscar ceremony.

“The movies garnering the most Oscar nominations included films about feature [sic] sympathetic terrorists, gay cowboys, communist sympathizers, and transsexuals,” said DeBrecht via press release, finding proof of Hollywood’s moral disconnection from mainstream values in the fact that “none of the best picture nominees were even in the top 20 highest grossing movies of last year!”

As some of those replying to my aformentioned Slog post have pointed out, most of the “20 highest grossing movies of last year!” were hardly the godly fare DeBrecht pretends, including a Satanic paean to witchcraft (Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire, #2), an interspecies love story (King Kong, #5), a murderous marriage thriller (Mr. & Mrs. Smith, #10, starring a pair of actual adulterers), two comedic odes to boning (Wedding Crashers, #6, and The 40-Year-Old Virgin, #19), and one family comedy suggesting butch homosexuals make good babysitters (The Pacifier, #17).

But as further investigation made clear, Katharine DeBrecht is not only a “conservative children’s book author” but a wonderfully hilarious wacko. Check out these delights I found buried in yesterday’s excerpted press release, consisting of DeBrecht’s issues with a variety of this year’s Oscar winners (sic throughout):

Best Picture: “Crash” (with about 180 obscenities and painting Americas as a bunch of biggots)
Director: Ang Lee, “Brokeback Mountain” (It’s ironic that he thanked China - who all those libs complain are taking American jobs)
Supporting Actress: Rachel Weisz, “The Constant Gardener.” (about bad big drug companies)
Actor: Philip Seymour Hoffman, “Capote.” (who portrays a flamboyant homosexual who exploits the murder of a family of four for his own self-absorbed gain (sound like Hollywood?)

And the hits keep coming….check out this official blurb on DeBrecht’s newest children’s book, “Help! Mom! Hollywood’s in My Hamper!”:

“Janie and Sam were happy just being kids—that is, until celebrities started popping out of their hamper to tell them how to behave and to sell them expensive clothes. With Hollywood and its friends in the liberal media declaring war on traditional values, what’s a concerned parent to do? It’s “Help! Mom!” to the rescue!”

The press release even comes with suggested interview questions for DeBrecht (who’s only doing television, thank you very much.) My faves:

*Some people refer to you as a modern Dr. Seuss. How does that make you feel?

*In your book, a character who looks a lot like Tom Cruise talks about a religion called ‘Toenailology.’ What’s that all about? And was he standing on a chair screaming?

and

*Last fall, Hillary Clinton’s spokesman attacked your book, former New Republic editor Andrew Sullivan called you a Maoist, and the Democratic Underground named you to their “Top 10 Conservative Idiots” list. Did all of these liberal attacks get to you, or in any way upset your family?

That’s enough for now. But clearly, Katherine DeBrecht is a genius.


CommentsRSS icon

The official blurb sounds like an episode of Robot Chicken.

Katherine is nuttier than a snicker bar. She reminds of this crazy nut case conservative mommy (and self proclaimed comedian) -
http://www.newswithviews.com/Vaughan/tricia2.htm

Katherine DeBrecht and Tricia Vaughn Smith are the most disturbing examples of mommies gone mad since serial Mom.

Wow wow wow! Are you able to post the entire press release? How could you have left the ridiculous interview questions off of yesterday's slog???

Dear Sniggles: I KNOW! Sorry about holding out with the "suggested interview questions," but due to deadline issues yesterday, I had to restrict my involvement with the Slog, which has the power to suck me into a narcotic vortex where deadlines don't exist...

But better late than never, and if you'd like me to forward you the full, cuh-RAZY press release, tell me so at schmader@thestranger.com.

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