Arts My Smobriety: Odds and Ends and Illness
It’s been about three weeks now, and I haven’t really wanted a cigarette at any point in the process. I did have a dream, about three days ago, that I was smoking, and my immediate response was panic: “Oh, fuck, now I’m gonna have to quit again.” Also, just last night, I developed the worst cold I’ve had in years. I’ve heard from most nonsmokers that a flu or flulike cold is usually nature’s reward for quitting smoking, and I think that this is, in fact, said reward (thanks, God.) It’s definitely the first sore throat that I’ve had since I started smoking, twelve years ago. I’m sure there’s a weird scientific explanation for that, but I can’t find it on Google.
But blogging is one of those things that one can do when ill, and there are two things I’ve been meaning to post:
Three days ago, the Goddamned Useless Seattle Times chimed in on the non-smoking bandwagon. Turns out a G.U.S.T. staffer has created a web page where you can climb the Space Needle using all the cigarettes you haven’t smoked. Which is one of the most Goddamned Useless things I’ve ever seen. Is anybody in Seattle as obsessed with the Space Needle in the way that Puff-Piece Journalists desperate for any kind of local color are obsessed with the Space Needle? Why would anyone want to climb the Space Needle with all the cigarettes they haven’t smoked? Do journalists who are having colonoscopies in South Dakota keep track of their enemas by comparing the output by volume with Mount Rushmore?
And, secondly,this potential law in California declaring that secondhand smoke is an air pollutant is a major sign. A major sign of exactly what remains to be seen, but it certainly does mean that today, I can imagine a United States where smoking is illegal, whereas yesterday, I couldn’t. I’m against making cigarettes illegal—I was against the smoking ban, even though I voted for it because it would make my smobriety a little easier, and yes, any smokers reading this can hate me for it—but, frankly, if one state were to declare them a toxic substance, we’re not that far off from a total ban, are we?