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Monday, January 16, 2006

Annie Wagner Is a Hologram; or, I’m Dying

Posted by on January 16 at 14:11 PM

I had lunch with Annie Wagner today. Then we went to Dick’s and got chocolate milkshakes. Then, crossing Broadway, I realized in my periphery that I could only see parts of Annie. I said to her, “I have the sudden feeling you’re a hologram.” Sure enough, everything on my left side seemed partial. In pieces. Missing chunks. This happened all the way back to the office. Now I am sitting at my desk and there is definitely some weird colorful activity happening in my left periphery. And things seem missing. A floating, colorful blind spot. My right eye is fine. My left eye is clearly not fine. Am I dying? Does anyone know what this is? Was there something in my chicken club at Septieme?

If anyone out there is a doctor, please post a comment. I’m going to call my doctor if this keeps up.


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Dude, I'd say you might be having a stroke and should go to the emergency room. But I know nothing of the dark and secret ways of doctors and medicine. The internet is not the best place to ask for this kind of advice.

acephalgic migraine, perhaps? http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Migraines#Acephalgic_migraine

if it doesn't go away after a while, or other symptoms appear, definitely speak to a doctor. (i am not a doctor, but have some lesser medical certification... and i've had scintillating scotomas myself a couple of times.)

Christopher, you're having a particularly nasty migraine. You should definitely see a doctor. I had a friend who had almost identical symptoms. They went away after awhile, but they came back the next day and literally knocked him out. He convulsed, passed out for a few seconds, and totally freaked out his wife and me. After a long visit to the emergency room, the results came back: A super migraine. People who have a bad headache and call it a migraine don't know the real thing.

another non-doctor weighing in to say that it's probably a migraine. if it gets worse, you should probably see a doctor to be sure that it isn't a transient ischemic attack or just to get medication for the next time. For an over the counter medication, Excedrin Migraine is pretty good. Send your intern out to the drugstore stat.

You should read An Anthropologist On Mars by Oliver Sacks. He talks a lot about weird vision effects and the brain. Apparently there are people who can't see movement, which is something I found fascinating. Seeing people as holograms sounds sort of similar..

(the fact that you were able to type this with reasonable syntax and vocabulary is a good sign.)

Christopher is on his way to have his eye/brain malfunctions checked out by professionals right now.
He's never had a migraine before, but that's the diagnosis I'm putting money on.
Thanks, everyone, for your armchair diagnostics and concern.

Cristopher,

Get a bloodtest. My pal's leukemia first started with a visual symptom.

Sorry to say.

Lloyd

you have MS.

Maybe this explains your idiotic "I find this funny." post yesterday. You're not an ass. You're just sick.


Go the doctor and ask a shitload of questions. Don't be shy about it. Let me know if you need a doctor recommendation.

Add my vote for "atypical migraine." I've had them for years, although it took a long time to get a good diagnosis. You can have a migraine without the headache, but with all sorts of weird visual distortions. Mine is usually the opposite of yours - the center of my field of visions goes blank, but I can still see peripherally. Very bizarre experience.

I bet it's a migraine. I suffer these symptoms a few hours before I get knocked down by them. I expirence them once or twice a month. It is not MS. I also have this diagnois. Your entire vision becomes blurry.

why didnt we start a wager?

im going with migraine, or minor stroke, or early signs of ms. the second two are obviously not as likely, but a friend started suffering from a random giant blind spot, and they said it was either a stroke or the early signs of ms. it eventually went away (like, over 3 or 4 months) and they still have no idea what it was. keep us updated!

I don't think it's very funny to take bets on weather or not he has a life debilitating disease.

That aside, I bet it's the Scurvy.

Or an LSD flashback!

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