While I was sitting in a cafe watching naked homeless dudes contemplate their defecation options, and sort through Savage Love mail about porn, premature ejaculation, BDSM, watersports, crossdressing, and what a woman should say to a male partner who fails to clean little bits of shit off the dildo he wants her to put in his ass (“buh-bye”), Rita grew to a Category 5 Hurricane.

A quick thought about Bush: If the federal response is slow (seems likely, since the same dopes—save Brownie—are still in charge), he’s toast. But if the federal response is quick and Rita slams into a mostly white area like, say, Houston, Texas, he’s still toast.